I think I am finally clear of sickness - my body has been resourceful enough so that I didn't get any flu symptoms other than being over tired and cranky. And seems that my sister is cured as well! Speaking of cranky - an 'Anonymous' mean person has been leaving hate comments on my blog.
Really.
Really.
Someone has too much time on their hands to go twice out of their way to comment on my last blog post. I wasn't going to acknowledge it but I guess I want them to know it does actually hurt my feelings - and this is my blog, right? So I get to talk about whatever the fuck I want to. Whoever you are, because of course you posted as anonymous - admitting who you actually are would mean admitting to yourself and the world that you are a bully. Being unfriendly and hurtful is being a bully. You have bullied me. An opinion is an opinion, but saying purposefully hateful things is very different. And success, you've been heard so can you please go back to living your perfect little life and never let me or my worries cross your minds path again? It would be very much appreciated. Thank you. Sincerely, me.
Moving on - I went to the movies with my friend from work: Skyfall, and it was excellent! I am not a huge fan of James Bond, but I loved the music and the cinematography. And Daniel Craig's chest - aholay crap. Be more ripped. Do it. Dooo it.
This weekend has overall been tiring but good. Lots and lots of Christmas presents bought Friday and Saturday, two birthday parties Saturday evening and some volleyball today. Does anyone else just friggin love buying Christmas presents? I am looking at everything right now, just can't wait to give it to you guys - one month (less than!) until I am visiting home with my family and friends!
I just love you guys.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Flu Symptoms
Tired: I have been feeling so fatigued
lately, beginning last week and this week terribly. I am most definitely coming
down with something. This feels worse than when I had mono.
My sister (and room-mate had similar
symptoms of fatigue last week and she was out of work this week two days puking
her guts out for seemingly no reason. So I am basically waiting for this flu to
catch up to me and just get it over with.
When you get sick or don’t feel well does
anybody else get really depressed? I just feel so unhappy at this moment.
Honestly I’ll tell you I am in need of a boyfriend right now because I think
that would make me feel better. I mean a secured bf not someone I am dating
because when you're dating someone you're still in that really nervous stage all
the time where you don’t want to seem too needy. This is one of those times
when you just want to have someone to be holding you or bringing you water or
soup or just cheering you up and making you feel better. That’s so important.
That I currently do not have. And therefore
I am depressed. Yupp – just call me Bella Swan and fuck you all! Seriously
though, I had an amazing day today and my friend here really helped me out. I
have been trying to get my winter tires put onto my car for the past month but it
is like crazy out here I mean last turkey at the grocery store before
thanksgiving crazy to try and get an appointment at a place to get your tires
switched. I have been nervously sliding my way around town for weeks now on my
summers. Today my friend found me a place to go, drove me home to get my car,
actually went with me so I wouldn't have to go alone, waited there with me and
came back with me. It was the sweetest thing. It was so thoughtful, honestly,
he did it all himself I didn't even ask him to he just knew I was stressed out
about it so he called around and got me an appointment at this random garage.
It was even done for less $$ than if I would have made an appointment for
a month from now at Canadian Tire. Instead of going back to work we went on a
driving adventure to this house he is taking care of and ended up taking hours
out of our work day in total just talking and stuff. This, my friends, is a
good friend. Yes. See this is why I should not be feeling sad or depressed
today! It makes no sense! Anyway, I have actually had a good day, but I still
feel like shit. Thank you random Edmonton flu situation for making me feel
depressed and needy for no reason whatsoever. OH and also I have my first hang
out with some guys from work this weekend – other than going out after work or
at lunch. I am excited we are going to see Skyfall. I am like a child excited
because these are friends that I made without the aid of my sister in Edmonton.
Yes. This is happening. Finally. Haha, well let’s hope so. And this is turning
into the longest blog about nothing ever.
ONE MORE THING guess who I added on
facebook last night when I couldn't sleep?? OH YES Mr. Colin Boyd. HAHA! Back
from the grave. Actually I am really excited to talk to him again see where he
is in life. This is what I mean about times changing, and people changing
(check my twitter feed). I was reading old blogs last night looking back at my
relationship with that guy and just cringing. And now I have zero feeling about
it so it is great!! This. This is how I wish all relationships were. I am tired
of feeling feelings, because there is just always too much drama. CUT the
drama.
Oh, I wish.
A self-portrait.
Monday, November 19, 2012
currently
feeling: very very happy
loving: early Christmas decorations at my workplace!
singing: soldier's eyes by jack savoretti
eating: liptons chicken noodle soup
wearing: big winter boots! YAY for not falling on my ass
craving: Cupcakes...so then i bought some...
obsessing: with w. loss
missing: nothing. i am extremely content with how this weekend went.
reading: the kill order (still, i am slow..)
watching: laguna beach
dreaming: of endless possibilities
wishing: that i had 20 seconds of insane courage
learning: to be sneaky..er
fighting: with terrible nightmares
deceiving: no one
playing: the best of games
Friday, November 16, 2012
Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?
OH SHIT. TOUGHEST. QUESTION. EVER.
Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?
Oh they are wrapped! Except the big ones like Saucers and Toboggans.
Colored lights on tree/house or white?
I am not sure - every year I seem to change my mind as to which I like better!!
Do you hang mistletoe?
I would definitely.
When do you put your decorations up?
Oh geez. Dec 24th. Biiiig slacker.
What is your favorite holiday dish?
ERHMAGAD - Bite-size QUICHE!
Favorite Holiday memory as a child?
Oh everything for Christmas with my family. Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Best times.
When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
What truth...no I don't even remember!
Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?
Never ever!
How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
Lights first then helter skelter! With Momma passing us sisters all the ornaments.
Snow! Love it or Dread it?
I love snow! But dislike it on the roads. I think it's beautiful and absolutely magical.
Can you ice skate?
Yupp! But it's always shaky for the first ten or so minutes for me.
Do you remember your favorite gift?
Ho ho ho...let's see. I remember the reaction I had a few years ago from a gift I believe one of my sisters gave me. You can't make that shit up.
What’s the most important thing about the Holidays for you?
The fam jam. God bless em. (And this year it will be seeing ALL MY FRANS I MISS YOU BUTTFACES!)
What is your favorite Holiday Dessert?
Ho...CANDY CANE ICE CREAM OH DEAR GOD SO GOOD.
What is your favorite holiday tradition?
Opening stockings Christmas morning with my sisters and parents! But we may be getting a little old this year sadface.
What tops your tree?
A wonderful one-winged Angel.
Which do you prefer giving or receiving?
HA tough competition. But definitely giving. Giving a good special gift. It just feels so right.
Candy Canes: Yuck or Yum?
They are traditional and I like me some tradition. Therefore Yum.
Favorite Christmas show?
A Christmas Story TIMES A MILLION
Saddest Christmas Song?
Little Drummer Boy
What is your favorite Christmas song?
ANOTHER TOUGHY! But def Mariah Carey - All I want for Christmas for you. On repeat. YOU TUBE THAT SHIT!
...Okay I will.
Monday, November 12, 2012
NEW APARTMENT
So I moved in to this place Sept 1st and I haven't shown it off yet. I took this video the first day it was all mine.
ChhhyEA!
I love it. Love it love it love it.
ChhhyEA!
I love it. Love it love it love it.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Trembling hands
I am here now.
This is a fire.
This spot that is like fire, burning, bright and engulfing It's more fun than you'll ever have. And more dangerous than anything you'll ever do.
Lately I've been wondering what's been going on. And I'm ready to surrender. Surrender to the enemies I am battling. To tremble in their outstretched palm. Exhilarated and intimidated - for once in my life timid. This is to be graceful and full of laughter. This is to be remembered.
Between that place and this, no regrets are left. The latter. The overstep. The deep plunge. This will be careful and calculated. This will be left up to chance. I have diamonds in my eyes that are reflected in yours. To be captured. This is a war.
I march with head held high, my eyes are smiling. And so are my feet. I see colors, they flash and direct my hands. My thoughts they're read like a book. An entwining that was never politely requested, such a private thing. Careful and calculated. Guarding. Give and take. Who are you if not what you feel. Crystal and beauty and fragility that will not fear destruction. That will surrender. I will not freeze.
This is a fire.
Friday, November 9, 2012
Well...shit.
You know. Today I got TOLD by my co-worker. Basically he told me that by 25 people should have their lives together - work, relationships, kids, the entire kit and caboodle. He's sitting there, telling me this, and all I can think is - Buddy, you are 24. What do you think is going to happen in one year? That your fairy god mother is going to swoop down and perfect your life?
I was feeling pretty good about myself, before this conversation. I'm 24. I have a wicked degree. I have a full time job. I make the money. I've done good for myself. I did exactly what I set out to do when I applied for University coming out of high school.
But ya, I don't have kids. I'm not married. I have no significant relationship in my life to speak of save the one I have with The Walking Dead. Does that make my life sad? I don't know.. I mean how much of someones life is dictated by that of anothers? Do we need someone to be happy? I DESPISE when I hear women whining "Oh I'm so lonely I don't have a boyfriend, waah waaah!" I mean get over it, there's more to life.
But then, is there?
I am twisting all up in my mind here. I definitely would love to be in a relationship right now with someone I loved, and who loved me. Someone to be that one person for you and you for them and all that comes with a meaningful relationship. But I also would love a million dollars. And it's not that simple.
And now that I can't get this subject out of my mind I feel like I am jinxing myself. Like, people always say "If you're looking for it, it won't happen. But the minute you're not, there it will be."
Well I guess this is where I say to myself: Self, maybe you should concentrate on your own self for awhile. ("Say self again." "Self.")
Eugh deep conversations with co-workers. #Keepitlight
I was feeling pretty good about myself, before this conversation. I'm 24. I have a wicked degree. I have a full time job. I make the money. I've done good for myself. I did exactly what I set out to do when I applied for University coming out of high school.
But ya, I don't have kids. I'm not married. I have no significant relationship in my life to speak of save the one I have with The Walking Dead. Does that make my life sad? I don't know.. I mean how much of someones life is dictated by that of anothers? Do we need someone to be happy? I DESPISE when I hear women whining "Oh I'm so lonely I don't have a boyfriend, waah waaah!" I mean get over it, there's more to life.
But then, is there?
I am twisting all up in my mind here. I definitely would love to be in a relationship right now with someone I loved, and who loved me. Someone to be that one person for you and you for them and all that comes with a meaningful relationship. But I also would love a million dollars. And it's not that simple.
And now that I can't get this subject out of my mind I feel like I am jinxing myself. Like, people always say "If you're looking for it, it won't happen. But the minute you're not, there it will be."
Well I guess this is where I say to myself: Self, maybe you should concentrate on your own self for awhile. ("Say self again." "Self.")
Eugh deep conversations with co-workers. #Keepitlight
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Celery and Cheese = HEAVEN
Some days are just Cheese Whiz and celery days. Today was one of those days.
I went shopping on the weekend and bought a bout a kazillion things. Including a new winter hat. It was excellent. See below.
I went shopping on the weekend and bought a bout a kazillion things. Including a new winter hat. It was excellent. See below.
Monday, November 5, 2012
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Man-friend problems
I swear to God I am so tired of boys being pissy. You're not in High School anymore. Get it together!
Lately at work I have been making some much closer friends - still in the 'work friend' category but definitely getting closer to the 'real friend' end of the spectrum. But honestly the more I get to know some of these guys, and let me tell you, they are all guys, I am seeing a whole new side of them! And it's chalk full of boy drama (that exists?? who fuckin knew)
Two of them really don't like each other and I get to hear about that all day long - like guys you work together, get over it. I strongly dislike one fellow I work with but I am still civil towards him, I just don't make a point to go talk to him. It's easy guys - if you don't like someone, do yourself a favor - stay out of their way and forget about them! Or else strip down and duke it out. Preferably with some sort of oil involved, you handsome devils you.
Sometimes I don't understand guys and what their problems are. Please, just get over it and do not get mad at me because of it!
Lately at work I have been making some much closer friends - still in the 'work friend' category but definitely getting closer to the 'real friend' end of the spectrum. But honestly the more I get to know some of these guys, and let me tell you, they are all guys, I am seeing a whole new side of them! And it's chalk full of boy drama (that exists?? who fuckin knew)
Two of them really don't like each other and I get to hear about that all day long - like guys you work together, get over it. I strongly dislike one fellow I work with but I am still civil towards him, I just don't make a point to go talk to him. It's easy guys - if you don't like someone, do yourself a favor - stay out of their way and forget about them! Or else strip down and duke it out. Preferably with some sort of oil involved, you handsome devils you.
Sometimes I don't understand guys and what their problems are. Please, just get over it and do not get mad at me because of it!
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