In an effort to return to my bloggy roots, I have lowered myself to writing blog posts, ON paper in class. This has nothing at all to do with how mind-numbingly bored I am. Currently I'm sitting in controls class chowing down on a seriously large (and might I add delicious) bowl of meat chili.
You ever get that feeling that lots of stuff is going on, but then you keep finding yourself bored, doing nothing? How does that happen? Is this like some internal subconscious self sabotage? I'm having a real hard time staying on track. And I find myself reaching out for attention, boy attention. BAD boy attention. Texting Colin and TA man, when I know I should be doing neither. I think I might possibly be brainwashed. How do I become one of those people who end up scaling mountains or trekking through the jungle in sturdy hiking boots that are molded to their feet.
I want to join the ranks of the adventurous. Travel, but not just travel...live elsewhere, somewhere a full 180 from where I am now. I want to get out, be adventurous, learn how to do things like hunt, survive off the land, shoot a bow and arrow. I want to be Rachel Weisz in The Mummy. I want exotic hair like that blond chick in The Last Air Bender, hair that is colored and strange but somehow fits. I want to learn to sword fight, do karate, be able to defend myself in a fight. I WANT ALL MY FANTASIES TO COME TRUE. (Don't we all?)
Ever think about what would happen if the world should end apocalypse style, or zombie nation, or germ warfare? Would you be one of those few survivors? I would want to be. I think my favorite books are those depicting post-apocalyptic worlds. Not that I want the world to end or anyone to die, obviously. Let's play this hypothetical. If it did happen. Where would you be? Who would you become. Would you be strong enough. I want to be.
just like to say I have amazing friends. lurv you all long time.
OHHH ya let's write a blog ya
This march break I've gotten drunk 3 times, gone out of town, seen a whole lot of family, applied for summer jobs, done homework, got surprise text messages from a person long past and worn alot of pajamas. Good times.
Future plans: get a job, finish homework, go grocery shopping, see a whole whack of movies
26 things that if you're really bored you'll read about me: from A to Z (from axe to....zee other axe)
Age: 22
Bed size: Double
Chore you dislike: Vacuuming = the devil
Dogs: Want one, or two, or many. Not 100% sure. We'll see how big my property is when I'm all grow'd up. But I know I want a BIG lovable dog that can pull me down the street if it wants to.
Essential start to your day: A good pee.
Favorite color: um um sky blue right now I'd say
Gold or silver:WHITE gold actually
Height: 5'11" BAM
Instruments you play(ed): Flute, for like a week
Job title: STUDENT MO FOCKER
Kids:a plenty. And they better not be like the kids on Nanny 911 or someones gonna geta hurt real bad.
Live: Fredericton baby
Mum’s name:Diane
Nicknames: T-fraser, T-frase, T-pain, you name it.
Overnight hospital stays: none to date
Pet peeves: people who stand too close to you in the grocery store line, PERSONAL SPACE BITCH!
Quote from a movie:
Righty or lefty: Righty
Siblings: Brother and two sisters and multiple sorority sisters
Time you wake up:7ish
Underwear: that is personal!
Vegetables you don't like: lima beans, green beans, baked beans. i dont like beans!
What makes you run late: I'm a slow getting ready-er
I live at home. I'm not happy. I don't live at home. I'm not happy. I have things to do, I just don't want to do them. What makes you want to do things?? I escape into books, movies, tv shows, food. It makes things seem, better I guess. There's no more support in my house hold. My mom won't even leave her bedroom. Everything is shit. I don't know what to do. I really don't.
Hai urbody. Is anyone else finding today extremely depressing? I pretty much would like to become president of the "I Hate Valentine's Day" Club.
I am one of those rare people who've never had the real valentine's day experience. Even when I was dating someone during, just didn't get that specialness. Special is special. And I seriously feel like I'm missing out. All of you who have someone who loves you and who you love, please realize how lucky you are.
This is kind of a combination post: Semi I like this guy but it's extremely complicated (like building the Eiffel tower out of foam puzzle pieces complicated) slash V-day is depressing me because I want to be spending it with him and I’m not.....(QUICK! SOMEBODY CALL THE WAAAH-MBULANCE!)
Like I said in the last post, I have a crush. It's a dangerous, dangerous, winner of ‘most-likely to crash and burn’ crush. (So, in other words, a typical Tyler Fraser crush.) It has also now fully developed; it's out of diapers, passed its angsty teen years and is now a fully-fledged bad ass of a mother.
I really, really tried. I really tried not to go there. Not to like him. I had myself convinced for awhile, the odds are so against it, that I didn't. But then all of a sudden I'm cautiously flirting, unable to stop myself, smilingly accepting the drink he’s made me at his party. Next thing you know I'm passing out in his bed with him, even though I know I shouldn’t and I'm fairly sure he does too. But not a thing happens and the night is brushed off as a fluke.
The next night I go over to do some studying but instead we end up watching Paranormal Activity 1 and 2. Still being very cautious, we don't touch eachother.
Monday comes, we talk, we act like everything is normal, like there isn’t something ripping in my stomach to jump him where he stands. But I am wearing a new outfit and feeling confident. The game is beginning to get really fun.
He asks me to come on Friday's pubcrawl. (At this point I am pretty much swooning, my head is spinning and he is clouding my brain of all self preservation. So I go. I have an amazing time. He invites me back to his place again. Everything up to this point is so innocent, and I think that is the true beauty of it. I like him, I think he likes me.I think he thinks I like him too. But neither of us has really shown anything towards each other. We both know it's wrong because he is my TA, and he is a good friend, and we've known each other for so long and nothing like this has come close to happening between us before (for good reason, he dated a friend of mine for 3 years until she broke up with him 4 months ago for another guy) and he is already dating another chick he met at New Years that I actually introduced him to! (Welcome to the complication that is my life) But in spite of it all we end up at his house with two other friends in tow. We order pizza and settle in to watch Knocked Up on tv. This time throwing caution to the wind he puts his arm tightly around me while I lean on his warm chest, watch the movie and munch on pizza.
So naturally, no words need to be spoken, I follow him into his bedroom when it’s time to sleep. Except we don’t sleep. Not for a while. The non-touching barrier is down and I can feel him behind me, his arm wrapped tightly around my stomach. And my skin is an electric current, buzzing, as the night progresses.
Finally sleep wins out over all.
Morning. No longer able to dream sweetly because now that I am awake and the glitter of the night before seems faded, all I can do is think about what lines have just been crossed, what it means and what's going to happen...
I have swing dancing class tomorrow. I am going on a winter adventure this weekend. AND!
I have a new crush. Bonafied. I don't know what to say about it. Some of you might guess him. Some might not. A release of name will not be happening until I am 100% comfortable with it. BAAAH I don't know what to do with my life I am too ridiculous. You always want what you can't have, right? Or can you have it.... :D....let high school mind games ensue.
so i bought that new fancy book for christmas, and decided it would be perfect as a dream journal. it has been sitting beside my bed for about a month now. i've been waiting for the perfect dream to be the first entry.
last night i dreampt that i was HEATH LEDGER's gf. Except he had really long wavy hair in a ponytail down to his ass and he was wearing a suit. and then colin was there and he was giving me a goldfish.
ladies and gentlemen, i think we have a winner!
also, had an epic weekend. any night that ends up with you and your best friends jumping up and down on the dancefloor together while passing around a full bottle of merlot that was snuck in is going to be a good night.
